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Double duty for Jack Huston this week as he stars alongside uncle Danny Huston in the elegant “2 Jacks”. With Sienna Miller in between these fantastic actors, I would totally be on board had I any idea what this film was actually about. With a horribly dated and vague trailer, there’s nothing to hook you into watching these fine performers.
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PASS
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I feel like I’m playing a strange version of six degrees of Kevin Bacon this week with many connected actors/directors/projects. Though Jack Huston is not in “Adventures in the Sin Bin”, he shares a television series, “Boardwalk Empire” with Emily Meade, who is in the film and whom I adore. Even though this film looks slightly unfunny, with the inclusion of Jeff Garlin, I am slightly more intrigued.
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25% MAYBE
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Robert Redford’s stranded at sea film “All Is Lost” has some Oscar swell behind it, taking the one man show that was “Life Of Pi” last year, taking out the animals, and leaving just Redford and his sinking sailboat. I have no doubt Redford can carry his own and with Academy Award nominated J.C. Chandor (“Margin Call”) writing and directing, it’s no wonder this film is being talked about.
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THEATER |
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A documentary following the lives of two African American boys who are excepted to a mostly white private school, “American Promise” won the Grand Jury Prize at Sundance. Tackling some present day issues with racism and the class system, I am slightly intrigued by the entire notion but not enough to watch the film.
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PASS |
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My biggest hope is that one would know what they’re getting into with a film titled “Big Ass Spider!”. Why Greg Grunberg (“Heroes”) is the lead in the film I will never know, but if we’re being completely honest, this doesn’t look entirely without hope. That being said, there’s plenty of other films I could be watching instead of this… like “Sharknado”… just kidding.
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PASS |
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Before there was “The Walking Dead” or “World War Z”, there was George Romero’s “Night of the Living Dead”. Containing interviews with Romero himself and the people that knew him around the time, “Birth of the Living Dead” recounts the state of country leading up to the production of the film and the events that followed.
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PASS |
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Huge winner at Sundance, “Blood Brother” is a way too serious documentary about a man that moves to India to live with children dealing with HIV. These documentaries are definitely important and bring about many emotions, but on a strictly entertainment standpoint, I cannot venture into these films unless guided there by fellow moviegoers or the Academy Awards.
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PASS |
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Love is love and that is apparent in “Bridegroom”, but the documentary about a gay man falling to his death and leaving his partner behind does not feel serious enough to warrant a theatrical documentary release. Had he been killed due to his sexual preferences or something more politically motivated, this could have been a much more powerful film. But accidents happen every day and had this happened to a straight couple, I’m not sure there would be a film at all.
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PASS |
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Needless to say, Jackie Chan is still alive despite the constant internet hoaxes that continue to swirl around. Regardless, Chan is well past the days of being able to sell a film and “CZ12” is no exception, remaining unflinchingly hokey and easily missed.
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PASS
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Instantly melodramatic and low in quality, “Fighting For Freedom” has nothing to go on except the few names that are its marque.
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PASS
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If you describe a film with a moniker like “makes Hostel and Saw look like Disney movie”, you have me somewhat intrigued. “Hate Crime”, the latest low budget found footage movie sees a home invasion in the hard R rated dynamic as masked men rape and torture a family celebrating a birthday.
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25% MAYBE
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More excited for what Abigail Breslin will do once she’s older, right now she’s in a stage of me not giving much of a damn for her performances. “Haunter” sees her in a horror-thriller as she connects with another girl through dreams and faces off with the haunting spirit of an old serial killer.
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PASS
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Fighting priests and action sequences battling the demonically possessed is what “Hellbenders” is all about. Led by Clifton Collins Jr., the film at least is able to poke fun at itself but not enough for me to give a crap about the film.
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PASS
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“I’m In Love With A Church Girl” sounds like a joke and had this appeared on Funny Or Die, it would have been hilarious. The fact that it’s real and that one of the arguments is “why don’t you go to church?” is completely laughable. Why these heavy Christian films keep popping up, I’ll never know, but if this isn’t a joke than there’s something horribly wrong with whoever created it.
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HELL NO
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Some sort of low budget mockumentary about a man that wants to film his life wearing a GoPro on his head during dates, conversations, and where I stopped watching, a class where he gets clothes-lined. Having no real through line, from what I saw, and not being very funny, if that’s what it was going for, “The Mirror” is too kitschy for its own good.
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PASS
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How do these crappy animated films get a theatrical release? I can see them playing on Nickelodeon or Disney, because kids will watch anything, but theatrical releases should be designated for the high quality films that come out of Pixar, Disney, and Dreamworks. “A Monsterous Holiday” is just plain bad.
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PASS
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Academy Award winning writer Diablo Cody takes the directorial reigns of her first feature, which she also wrote, titled “Paradise”. Julianne Hough plays the lead, a 21 year old that survives an accident that leaves her a little less desirable. With the insurance money she heads to Las Vegas to live for the first time, meeting Academy Award winner Octavia Spencer and comedian Russell Brand along the way. Although I do not have high hopes for the film, I enjoy Diablo Cody enough to give it a fair chance.
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RENTAL
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Yet another low budget, satanic worship town horror flick, “The Secret Village” relies on crappy, high pitched tones and evil stares to sell the film, all of which are paper thin and absolutely worthless.
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PASS
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Could be good or could be crap, there’s really no in between and the with a trailer that’s less than one minute, it’s hard to tell. Yet another handheld found footage film, this feels like the camping trip that occurs in “Blair Witch 2” and if done correctly, “Toad Road” could be amazing. But without anything to steer me in that direction, I just can’t give it the benefit of the doubt.
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PASS
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