ROCK OF AGES || June 15th, 2012

ROCK OF AGES || As far as musicals go, Rock Of Ages at least carries an interesting cast and some popular hair metal music which can be enjoyed by all. With some unknowns mixed with the likes of Alec Baldwin and Tom Cruise, the film has enough star-power to give it an edge. Add to that the age old tale, reminiscent of Detroit Rock City, of parents rebelling against the “dirty” music, and you’ve got yourself what could be a winner. RENT
THAT’S MY BOY || Adam Sandler films are just getting obscure and unfunny. The trailer for That’s My Boy may have been funny if it came out around the time of Happy Gilmore or Billy Madison, but this comedy has been said and done before, bringing nothing new, or even exceptionally raunchy to the table. The “20 beers is my limit” line is just not funny, nor is most of the Andy Samberg childhood stories, which is a shame since Samberg is usually pretty hilarious and would have matched nicely with Sandler. Though I may see this eventually, it’s films like this and Jack & Jill that make me regret Sandler’s career.

41 || HBO Documentaries releases a look at the life and career of George H.W. Bush, which is less about entertainment and more about chronicling, it appears. Though retrospective looks at people’s lives can be great, it seems random to be making a documentary about Bush’s life for no apparent reason. PASS
AMERICANO || Salma Hayek is sexy as hell and playing a stripper is enough to get me to see this film, as lewd as that may be. There looks to be depth to this film, as well, as a son returns to America after his mother dies, only to find she has willed her apartment to a woman named Lola that he does not know. So he embarks to find her in Mexico, to which he must unravel the mystery behind this attractive woman. There is definitely enough going for this film for me to see it. STREAM
BINDLESTIFFS || Brought to you by the director Kevin Smith, Bindlestiffs has the quality of a home video, but the content of what is described as “better and raunchier than Superbad”. The film does look somewhat humorous, but hidden behind the poor film quality, it may be hard to look past. I’m sure this won’t be the last we hear about this film, knowing Kevin Smith. PASS
EXTRATERRESTRIAL || Very little is explained in the trailer for this film besides that it is the “Woody Allen of science fiction films”, which has my interest somewhat peaked, as I enjoy Woody Allen for the most part, and science fiction films can sometimes be favorites of mine and if done correctly, I have a feeling this film could offer something new to the genre, but without any more explanation, it is hard for me to justify wanting to see this. STREAM
FAST GIRLS || Surprisingly, a film about strong women running track has never been made before and I have to offer up some props for delving into some un-filmed territory. Though the story does little for me, I can appreciate a good female sports film and see this for what it is, which follows alongside films like “Center Stage” and “Stick It”. PASS
FERRARI KI SAWAARI || Nothing against this foreign release, but the entire trailer is so painstakingly repetitive, it is hard to want to see an entire film of its content. What looks like a childish heist film really does not peak my interest what-so-ever. PASS
THE GIRL FROM THE NAKED EYE || What looks like a take on Sin City, The Girl From The Naked Eye has style, sex appeal, and a mystery storyline that looks to be able to capture the attention of its audience effectively. Starring Dominique Swain, who I feel I have not seen acting in quite some time, and Sasha Grey, who does not appear in the trailer to my knowledge, this private eye film rides the line between either a really solid flick or a dud in very attractive clothing. STREAM
MARINA ABRAMOVIC: THE ARTIST IS PRESENT || Yet another modern art film, the least I can say is at least it is not more modern dance. Though I am never certain on what constitutes art, I feel I can predict what this film will be about and what questions it will try to raise and, to be perfectly honest, I could care less. PASS
PATANG: THE KITE || Patang goes out of its way to bring to light Roger Ebert’s positive review of the film and though I do believe Ebert saw something spectacular in this film, I do not get any of that from the trailer. PASS
SOMEBODY’S HERO || Synopsis: An average accountant attempts to fill the boots of a movie-based superhero. PASS
SOMETHING FROM NOTHING: THE ART OF RAP || I thoroughly enjoy hip hop music and several different artists and their stories have always interested me, especially when hearing certain songs describe the situations they have been through. Something From Nothing covers the broad spectrum of rap and actually includes the stories of more than a dozen different artists. I look forward to hearing about Snoop Dogg, Dr. Dre, Eminem, and Ice T. STREAM
THE TORTURED || Every week I like to point out the films that feel like Lifetime Original Movies. This week’s candidate takes a turn for the dark, but you’d expect that from the producers of Saw. Mainly the cast and the story make this one feel Lifetime-y. When a young boy is kidnapped from his parents in broad daylight, the punishment of prison is not enough, so the family takes matters into their own hands and tortures the criminal. What the end goal of this film is, I may never know, nor do I really care. Though I do enjoy Erika Christensen from time to time, she is not enough to get me to see this film, unfortunately. PASS
UFO IN HER EYES || Synopsis: A mysterious Chinese peasant woman one day claims she has seen a UFO, from that day the world turns to upside down. The film is a metaphoric political satire on post-Mao era China. PASS
THE WOMAN IN THE FIFTH || Yet another film Roger Ebert approves of, Ethan Hawke and Kristen Scott Thomas make a passionate on-screen couple, but I am just not sure how many missing children stories I can stomach. I give the marketing team an “A” for effort, but honestly, I feel like I’ve seen this film way too many times. STREAM
YOUR SISTER’S SISTER || With what looks like a great cast (Mark Duplass and Emily Blunt) along with a sincere, heartfelt story, this Indie looks right up my alley. Not to mention I will see just about any film with Emily Blunt. Rosemarie Dewitt is also a great sell and with these two playing sisters, there’s not much more I need to sell me on this film. RENT



  • Rock Of Ages
  • Your Sister’s Sister


  • Americano
  • Extraterrestrial
  • The Girl From The Naked Eye
  • Something From Nothing: The Art Of Rap
  • That’s My Boy
  • The Woman In The Fifth


  •  41
  • Bindlestiffs
  • Fast Girls
  • Ferrari Ki Sawaari
  • Marina Abramovic: The Artist Is Present
  • Patang: The Kite
  • Somebody’s Hero
  • The Tortured
  • UFO In Her Eyes

4 Comments on “Theatrical Releases: Rock Of Ages & That’s My Boy

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